School Retreat

On the second day of school, the whole MYP  (Middle Year Program) got onto three buses and headed out to the middle nowhere to spend our retreat at a campsite (it wasn't really out of the middle of nowhere, I just literally have no idea where we were and it was actually quite nice). The bus ride was only about a hour long and didn't feel that long at all. I sat with my new friend, Miruna and talked about my life and high school in the States. Luckily, there were no dramatic experiences on the bus ride like Argentina (if you don't know what I mean, read my post titled Buenos Aires Trip) and it was actually surprisingly calm. Soon we arrived at the campgrounds, got placed in our
'cabins' (they were more like trailers), and were sent off to put our stuff away and get ready for the first activities. I was placed in cabin 23 with Miruna as well as one other girl from my grade and two ninth graders. Cabin 23 also happened to be the farthest from the main meeting point and camp activities so it wasn't exactly convenient for us to go back and forth to our cabin. Our cabin had one main living area with the walls lined with couch-like things, a fireplace, and a kitchen. There was also two bedrooms, a master and a normal bedroom with two beds. I got the smaller bedroom, Miruna the master, and the other girls camped out in the living room. There was also a little bathroom with a sketchy shower and light switch that was on the ceiling. Overall, it was a very interesting, sketchy yet cute place.

  After settling into our cabin, spraying each other with weird lemony smelling bug spray (ticks are a big nuisance in the region of Lithuania that I'm in so I was basically freaking out the whole time about them because I've always had bad experiences with bugs and bug bites both in Oregon as well as foreign countries) we headed to our first activity. We then got split into groups by color, I was in the black group, and played icebreaker games in order to get to know each other. The first one was call "I have never/I have never been" where we had a piece paper that we were to stand on placed in a circle and someone was in the middle of the circle. The person the middle would then something they have never done or a place they had never been and the people who had done it or had been there had to run through the middle of the circle and find a new place to stand and the person in the middle could steal someone's spot. If somebody didn't find a spot then it was their turn to say I have never... It was actually a pretty fun game until it started pouring down rain and every group decided to go into the shelter tent. After that we played another game to learn each other names that we had to imitate a washing machine, and three other items that I can't remember. It was awkward for me because not only did I not know people's names, I didn't know how to pronounce them but luckily nobody remembered my name so I was the last person to be told to do something and didn't have to say anyone's name. After that we had to split our groups in half and then build a tower that was a meter high and self standing out of four pieces of paper, as much tape as we needed, and a cup. We were given a few minutes to plan and when that time was up we could no longer communicate and had to build it in silence. Unfortunately, my group failed to build the tower so that it was self standing and failed at not talking. We then were sent back to our cabins to prepare for lunch. Lunch took quite a long time because of the rain, the teachers were having a hard time lighting the BBQs for the chicken. My cabin was the last one to get food. After that we were regrouped and then sent off to do other activities.

   My first activity was a survival one. We were given the task to 'survive the night' by building a shelter to withstand wind and rain, find food, build a fire, and construct an SOS sign (and possibly a fifth one but I don't remember it) but we couldn't pull anything off of trees or brushes, approach the water, and had to use only what we found on the ground. However, we could take one thing from one of our group member's cabin to help us. There was basically nothing on the ground and the wood that we found had just been drenched in the previous rain shower so we basically failed the task. The other group was very determined to start a fire and tried to use bug spray to start it with a match... I think the girl holding the match was very lucky to not of burned her fingers.

  After that activity we headed to another one called 'hiking' and were split up into three smaller groups. It wasn't exactly hiking it was more like do an activity and then follow coordinates by measuring meters to the next activity. The first activity we had to run around a pole ten times, throw a ball at a goal post, collect the ball, and then hand it off to our next group mate. They timed us for each activity. The second one was to transfer water cup to another person's cup with our mouths (exactly how it sounds) which was extremely difficult and ended with a lot of people getting water poured on their faces instead of into the cup. We finally finished that one and then went the final activity (that we got to) which was where we all had to stand on a mat and flip it onto it's other side without stepping off of it. One kid knew exactly what to do so we got it down very quickly.

     The final activity of the day for my group was boating. I got paired up with a eighth grader and we basically just paddled around the area of the lake that we could go. Some kid (a 7th grader) kept on trying to capsize us by ramming his boat into the side of ours and others just wanted to splash each other. I saw this as sort of immature and actually got quite frustrated with the fact. I began to reflect on the other activities of the day and realized how immature almost all the kids were. This made me super upset, hesitant, unhappy, and really miss my host family. However, I reminded myself that a lot of these kids were two to six or more years younger than me so it their behavior was quite normal for their age, I was just used to being around people who were mature as I am (or at least somewhat close). They then started to grow me as I saw this difference and made myself accept it.

   After boating we had dinner where we had to help roast sausages. We had hotdogs basically but the hotdog buns were more square and less puffy than what I'm used to in the states. I wish I had taken a picture to show the difference (however I couldn't because they took our phones away, that's the reason why I have no pictures for this entry, sorry about that). None the less, the hotdogs were still good. We then had our final activity before bed which was a choice between board games, campfire songs, football (the thing that the weird Americans call soccer), basketball, volleyball, and relaxation/mediation with the school counselor. My friends and I choose to play board games. After that 45 minutes we were sent to our cabins but I was in charge of getting our bedding. After collecting all five of the blanket and pillow cases and sheets I headed back alone in the pitch black forest to my cabin. I was super scared of walking into the wrong cabin that when I walked into my cabin and saw someone who was not from my cabin I instantly said "Wrong cabin! Sorry. Wait yes, right cabin? Cabin 23?" and my cabin mates just stared at me like I was crazy. I gave them their bed stuff and started to get ready for bed. When it was time for lights out I couldn't fall asleep for some reason despite being very tired. It wasn't because the girls in the living room were taking half the night (this was not reason at all actually, I just have a hard time sleeping in new places) but I like half slept/half lied awake all night long. When it was finally time for morning I got ready quickly and then headed for breakfast.

     After a breakfast of sandwiches we split back into our groups and headed to the first of the last two activities. Mine was capture the flag and I was, surprisingly (well to me because this game is quite popular in the States), one of the only kids who had ever played it before. The other team won first which took them about ten minutes to defeat us. After that my team won in a matter of two minutes. The third and final game was to determine the winner had started. We went back and forth on trying to get the flag over and finally one of the girls on the other team got our flag, however, she got tagged right on the border. Then the debate of what to do started. The teacher in charge stopped the game and each team debated what we should do. The teacher then asked me, the most experienced one what to do and I told him my most honest answer: I had never seen experienced this before and had no idea. However, in the States, if this were to happen the teacher probably would have called it a win on the other team (and our team would get angry because it was on the border and so on). We then concluded to put the flags a couple meters away from the border and then see who won from there. I don't anyone won that game because we were all constantly fighting about it.

    The final activity was a communication exercise. They split us into two groups and sent us to two activities. One of them we had to navigate through 'high voltage wires' between two trees and if someone touched a wire then the whole group had to start over. Some of the guys decided that they wanted to jump over and others wanted crawl. After some of the guys jumped over (they had carried a table over, climbed on it and then jumped over the wires. I was about ready to jump when I remembered my fear of falling. I didn't want to jump but I was determined to but I knew if I did I would probably land wrong and seriously injure myself on barely my second week of being in Lithuania. Luckily, one of the guys offered to help me over by having me step into his hands and lower me done (this was a lot harder than we thought and I ended up doing an arabesque {balancing on one foot with the other extended to the back for those who do not know ballet terms} as he tried to lower me down to the ground). I was still terrified and luckily he didn't drop me and I didn't injure him (that I know of). However, that was all in vain because one of the crawlers couldn't keep his butt down (this was a reoccurring problem) and we all had to go back. We all ended up crawling under it. After that we had to navigate through a chess board like course with only sounds (one person was blind folded). This was my least favorite activity. After that we had lunch, collect our things, cleaned up the camp and cabins, took a picture, and then headed back to Vilnius by bus. The bus ride felt longer, probably because I was extremely tired but I couldn't sleep. I just looked out the window at the beautiful countryside of Lithuania. We arrived at school and then all headed home.

  Even though I got frustrated quite bit during the trip, it was overall a good experience for me because I got to know my classmates as well as other students in my school. I'm glad that was able to go on a culturally enriching, interesting yet fun trip with school while I was here.

*Sorry for taking so long to post! And also sorry for the super long post, you can probably see why I procrastinated writing it for so long.

The 1st of September

Every year in Lithuania, school starts on the 1st of September and carries a series of traditions. First off, the students dress up nicely and bring flowers to their teachers. There was also a ceremony at the beginning of the school day  to welcome everyone back. Oh and school generally started later. For example, my school day started at 10:00 where it normally starts at 8:30. Apparently, the school day on the first is normally over when the ceremony concludes, however I had a regular school day instead.

First day of school flowers

   My day started off around 7:15 and I got ready for school. I wore one of my favorite dresses (the only one I brought) and took pictures with my host family. After that, they left for my host sibling's first day of school. Then, around 9:15, one of my coordinators came and picked me up for my first day. We got stuck in traffic (and because I forgot my flowers) and were a little late to school which was okay for that day at least. After a short ceremony, I headed with my grade for Homeroom. Homeroom was for like half of the day and it was one of my classmate's birthdays so we ate pizza (and didn't go to lunch after). After lunch we had Lithuanian (which lucky for me,  it's to learn the language and not a literature class). And finally Humanities/ Individuals in Society. The day went pretty quick and I made a few friends! I then met with my host brother and headed home by bus with him and his friends.

  That was September 1st for you! I'll talk more about school in another post as well as the school retreat I went on with the whole MYP program (6th-10th grade)! 

One Week (Almost)

Tomorrow marks my first week in Lithuania! It's been amazing and I'm so happy to of had all the experiences I had. 

   My day of travel started at the ungodly hour of 2am where I got up, showered, got ready, and took care of last minute things. Also, I had to say goodbye to my pets which I already miss (Love you Tony [my dog] and Gizmo [cavy]). After that we left the house and headed to the airport. I was surprised when I didn't fall asleep in the car, because I was only running on about 1-2 hours of sleep and I always fall asleep in cars. After a short 50 minute drive, we arrived at the airport where i checked in, checked my bag, waited, said goodbye to my dad and sister, and headed through security with my mom. Trying not to cry, I said goodbye to her (who was crying [thanks mom, I still love uou]) and boarded the plane. 

   On the plane I put in my headphones and let fatigue take over. That only lasted about a hour. Then I alternated between looking out the window, calculating the time left, and reading. After almost 5 hours of travel, I arrived at Dulles in Washington, D.C.. 

   Upon my arrival, I was having a hard time navigating through the airport and finding where to go. I also proved how much the letter Z sounded like B in a loud train while I was trying to find gate B but ended up at Z. Thanks to some help from Emma, I found my way to my gate. There I finally got to meet Emma! We talked some and then our U.S. Coordinator, Skye, came and joined us and talked to us. She collected our paperwork, took our picture, and then sent us off onto our boarding. Once we found our sits we found out that our luggage was too big to fit a certain way into the overhead luggage and had to put them way in the back in empty spot, which caused us to take up more room. We then sat in out sits and talked some more. Takeoff time had past and we still hadn't left. We then kept being told that it would be another 20 minutes 2-3 times. Finally we took off, 1 hour after our initial takeoff time, which I was worried because we only had 1 hour 25mintues originally in Vienna and now we were going to have like 30-40 minutes. 

    The plane ride was long and I couldn't sleep very well or much. So I watched a few movies and tv shows while trying to pass the time. After our planeride, we landed and had to wait for everyone to get off the plane before we could receive our bags. From there we run through border patrol, security and to our gate. We made it with a few minutes to spare. We then got on a bus and headed out to our plane. It was a propeller plane which scared me at first but was kind of cool in the end. After a short ride we arrived in Vilnius, got our bags and then headed out the Exit door. We didn't know where the customs was but apparently there wasn't one. We found Kevin, one  of our coordinators, who took out big bags and headed us to his car. From there we went to a back, had a snack, looked at shoes, got our 'super high-tech €25 phones", and then went to the office for an orientation. It was good but I was falling asleep half the time. After that he took us to our host family houses. We dropped off Emma first and then he took me to mine (which I then started to fall asleep in the car). We arrived I got to finally meet my family! I was so nervous and scared that I didn't want Kevin or Lena to leave but then I started to talk to them I felt a lot better. After dinner, I unpacked, gave them their gifts, showered and headed to bed. That was my first day (and travel) for ya! I'll write more about my first week some other time because this is already quite long... 

  

The Paths We Take

This is just one of my random posts with some of thoughts, it doesn't really have anything to do with my current exchange other then kind of talking about my high school journey. I may also ramble a little and attempt to be inspirational so I apologize for that.

   In high school and pretty much my whole life people have been asking what I want to do when I grow up or what my plan for college is (you know the drill because everyone gets asked this) and when I answered I always had a straight answer that I was sure I was going to end up doing. In  early middle school I thought I wanted to pursue a career in dance and was looking at dance schools and settled on a school in North Carolina. Then in eighth grade I decided that I wanted to go into physical therapy and started to look into schools for that. After I found out I would need six-eight more years of schooling after high school and I wasn't for that so I decided to look elsewhere in the medical field and settled on radiology and or lab work my freshman year. Completely thinking that my mind was made up I started looking at all the body and medical classes I could take at my high school and learned what I could outside as well. My mind was set.

    The end of freshman year came and my advisor made us draw maps of what we think the rest of the educational life would be like and to make sure we put road blocks in there in case we changed our minds because we didn't know if a summer camp would change our minds on what we wanted to do or if we went on a exchange (and the like). My friends and I laughed at her friends because we thought it was funny that she was questioning our already made up plans and I knew for sure that I would NEVER go on an exchange that would change my mind about going into the medical field. Man, as much as I don't want to admit it, she was right... The summer after that was the one that I spent in Argentina and ended changing my mind about everything.

   I guess what I'm trying to say is that as much as we try to plan ahead, something can always pop up and cause us to change our minds. We may not expect it but it happens and we have no control over the situation that we are now in, we can only go with it, change our minds, and see where in life it takes us.

         And it's always okay to change your mind.

  I may say right now that I want to go into the international field and become a Foreign Service Officer or Ambassador but I could always change my mind to go back to the medical or even environmental field. What I'm trying to say is that it is okay to dream and that it is okay to plan your life ahead but roadblocks, hills, potholes, and flat tires can always bring us down or change our minds (or we could change them on a positive experience as well) and that is okay. If your life was perfectly planned out it would be so boring because you would know exactly what is going to happen, the joy of not knowing what us coming next will be gone, which would personally, in my opinion,  would make life bland. 

   So get out there. See where the world will take you and what it will bring. Take a chance, you just might find our passion. Try what you have been wanting to try nobody is here to stop you, only yourself. If you crash and fall, it's okay because that's life.It's your life so get out there and live it!  Remember that you can't change the past but you can always change your mind and path to do what you enjoy or what you believe you want to do. As long as you're happy, that's all that matters.

My Decision and Why... (Revised Edition)

   I've been giving it some thought and have reread my last post concerning my decision and have realized that there are actually a lot more reasons then that that affected my decision. Also, my reasoning has changed since then due to some very unexpected pop-up and roadblocks that caused me to question and then ultimately rethink my decision.

      First off, I never expected to get ExCEL Abroad and when I received my finalist notification I was in shock. It just seemed right to me because of the shock and overall excitement of receiving it. But I wondered if I really wanted it or was my feelings telling me to take it because I was surprised? Was it really the right decision for me? It didn't help that I was getting fixed signals from my friends and family for what to choose. One's would say Germany and talk down Lithuania while others would tell me that I was basically stupid not to take Lithuania. If someone would talk down Lithuania, I would instantly start defending it and though people didn't really talk Germany down, I'm sure I would have defended it too. Just because of that and of the reasons said in my previous decision post, I chose Lithuania.

   Then the really unexpected happened. The day was going to drop out CBYX I got an email from my host family from Germany. That really stopped me in my tracks and I had no idea what to do. I instantly started to rethink my decision. The family seemed so nice, sweet, and perfect but most of all very excited to host me. I felt torn in two, I wanted to go with my initial decision but I felt bad about Germany. My fellow exchange applicant friends had no advice for me because I don't think any of us knew what to do in this situation and really, it was my problem which ultimately would end in some sort of heartbreak whether it be giving up the program that I thought I would never get or giving up a family that wanted to host me and were nice.

  There was one other problem, at the time, which was about 45 days after I got notified for ExCEL Abroad, I had not heard from ExCEl Abroad AT ALL. Not only were my parents getting uneasy about that but I was as well. This made me question my decision even more and made the decision that much harder.

   Finally, after almost two months, I finally got some information about ExCEL Abroad and though it tore my heart, I finally let go of CBYX. I was very sad about giving it up and not being able to be a part of the CBYX family but outside all of the hurt I was feeling I felt as though I had made the decision that was right for me or at least that's what I think. (Shout-out to all my CBYX friends as they get ready to leave 13-14 days! Love you guys and I hope you have a wonderful year in Germany!).

   But one thing for sure was that I wasn't quite sure my about my reasoning about it. When asked I would kind of just say what my previous blog post said and or try to remember some of it at least. It wasn't until the other day that I think I finally realized my true reasoning. When I was first applying for all of these exchange programs, my fellow applicants and I would all try to figure out what, if we were offered all of the programs, program we would chose. I said that I was chose ExCEL Abroad  even over the Russian program that I initially really wanted. I understand that decisions change but after doing research, I really wanted to go to Lithuania almost more then any of the other countries offered by the other programs. Also, I thought being one of the first people to go would be amazing and would possibly make me stand out more in future job interviews and maybe even make me look better. It was a risk and I wanted to take it. It felt right. That doesn't at all mean that I'm not terrified or nervous about going but it's one of those why not's. I know that no matter what country I chose I would also question what the other country's experience would have been like but I felt more so with Lithuania, almost like I was throwing one of the biggest opportunities of my life away (not saying that Germany wasn't a huge opportunity, it just feels to me that in my situation that I would question myself more if I took Germany). I know that for the rest of my life I will be asking myself what Germany would have been like but that's what happens when you get offered more then one scholarship, country, or opportunity and it's the price you have to pay.

    Looking back on all those times my exchange applicant friends and I would wonder if given all 3-4 programs that we applied for and what we would choose, I'm so happy now that I only got accepted into two out of the four programs because my decision probably would have been a lot more harder. After going through my rollercoaster-of-decision-making, I am now speaking directly to future applicants: even if you only get one of the three or four programs that you apply for, don't feel bad! It doesn't mean anything and whatever program you got I am sure is what is best for you and you are going to have an amazing year. You will have a great time no matter what program you are on and or what country you're in, as long as you make it that way. You are in charge of your experience, if you think it's going to be crappy then it's going to crappy and if you think it's going to be great then it'll be great! Just be happy that you get to go on exchange because there are a lot of kids who wish they could be in your shoes.

 I am very grateful to of had these opportunities and the chance to make a decision. Though it was hard and did have a lot of bumps I'm glad that they happened because though it did make my decision harder to make it did help in some sort of way (if that makes any sense at all).  I can't wait to see where it takes me in and am beyond excited for departure to Lithuania in 34 days!

Graduation and June in General

I did it, I graduated high school! In three years too! I'm so happy to be done with high school and now am able to move on to the next chapter of my life. But first I have to get through summer. My summer has been eventful but not really. It started off with the all night Grad party at Bullwinkles which was okay. I would have had more fun if I hadn't of been having a major allergy attack all night long. About a week later I had to get my wisdom teeth out (which really sucked but wasn't as painful as I thought it would be at all) and then a week after that I had my 17th birthday! Now I'm just hanging out with my friends and helping harvest garlic. So June has actually been a pretty good month for me! What was also nice about this month was that I started to hear from ExCEL about details on my travel.

  I will be leaving on August 24th at about 8 am to catch a plane to Washington DC where I will meet with Emma, the other ExCEL Abroader, and we will then catch a plane to Austria. After Austria we will arrive in Vilnius, Lithuania on August  25th at some time in the afternoon. I'm getting excited but I'm also starting to get a little scared too. It'll come so quickly and I'm not freaking out yet over the fact that I only have about 55 days left in the States! For now I will have to start studying Lithuanian, get ready for my last county fair, and of course start the dreadful thing called packing. But everything will be fine.
 

  A couple of my friends who've received scholarships through other programs have already left for their year abroad. I'm excited for them and can't wait to hear more about their countries! And my other friends come home in a couple days from Thailand and Italy. That is both exciting (I've missed them and can't to see them) but I know how bittersweet it is for them and I wish them luck and hope they adjust quickly and nicely to life back here at their old homes. (Shoutout to Evan and Laney as I wish them luck in Thailand and another shoutout to Elena as she comes home from Italy and Erin as she comes home from Thailand). Both of these are the beginning and the end. The beginning of their new life both either in their host country or back home but it also either pauses or ends their life in their home or host country. It's bittersweet for everyone because in either place they are leaving loved ones but will be returning to old ones or making new ones. It's just a reminder of the never-ending exchange process and I'm so proud to of been a part of and am so blessed to be a part of it again. Here's to 55 days left! 

Ps: sorry for the scatter-minded blog, that's exactly how I feel right now! 

My Decision and Why

   I'm not joking this was probably the hardest decision I have made this year and maybe even in my life (so far). With that I should just cut to chase: after much thought and consideration I have decided to go with ExCEL Abroad to Lithuania! This program will be in its first year so I will get to be a pioneer for it. Though it's not as established (yet) as cbyx, I'm okay with it and I'm excited to be a part of its first year and watch it grow from there. It's a bit more pressure than cbyx, as I will basically be setting the tone for this program (along with a couple other students who I have yet to meet) which is super cool. Both programs would have been cool and I'm glad I was fortunate enough to make that decision.

  My parents made this decision completely up to me which was good but it wasn't helpful in helping me make a decision. They told me they weren't going to influence any country or program more though I feel that one of them was but indirectly and when she did I would defend Lithuania and want Lithuania more. All I could think about was Lithuania and how awesome it would be to be the first on the American side of the program! I even tried flipping a coin but got the same upset reaction if I didn't get Germany or if I didn't get Lithuania. I then decided to make a pro-con chart and then weigh my options from there looking at the programs, countries, language, and culture. I felt as though my heart was telling me Lithuania but my mind was telling me why not both?  I asked my fellow applicants what they would chose and why which was helpful. We discussed it and they even told me that they thought my heart was saying Lithuania (shout out and huge thanks to Megan, Jeremy, and Alexis who were the ones who discussed this with me). I decided to listen to my heart.
 

    So now the count down begins! I don't know exactly what day I will be leaving but I most likely will be leaving in August. I also have to get a health exam and sign some more papers and of course wait for more emails/information on the program! And of course learn some Lithuanian (and graduate high school). I'm super excited and sort of terrified but I can't wait to see where this takes me!